


Murky waters

by Galaxy_Angst



Category: Harry Potter - Fandom
Genre: Already dead Harry Potter, Angel Harry Potter, Angels are born out of suicide, Draco Malfoy is Bad at Feelings, Draco and Harry had a child, Draco has nightmares nightly, Draco is a single parent, Draco is a widow, Everyone Needs A Hug, Everyone is grieving, Grieving Remus Lupin, Grieving Sirius Black, Guardian Angels, Harry commited suicide, M/M, Mentally hurt Draco, Past Mpreg, Sad with a Happy Ending, Spirit Guides, Suicide, Veela Draco
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2018-01-18
Packaged: 2019-03-05 09:18:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13384788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galaxy_Angst/pseuds/Galaxy_Angst
Summary: Draco longs for Harry to be alive again, desperate to have the family he always wanted back together. Missing the image of Harry holding their son, holding tightly onto what once was their everything. Harry can only watch as his family crumbles...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: Harry already committed suicide. If the subject being mentioned upsets you, please turn away. As someone who has dealt with it and seen others struggle, please respect those that have past on. Suicide isn’t comical or something light hearted if it seems like that to you, please turn back, now.

Sunlight pours through the window panes of Scorpious Malfoy’s bedroom, shifting past the little boys crib that sat isolated in the middle of the baby blue painted room. 

Pitch black siloetes of a stag, wolf, and a dog chase after each other across the walls. Leaping from high rocks and slipping down slopes near a grand stream.

Meanwhile inside the cradle lay a small green eyed toddler with soft blonde locks, small legs kick the air. Everything for a moment seems still, until a figure seemingly draped in starlight appears beside the crib. 

A messy mass of black hair covers their scalp, providing warmth and a sense of softness to their appearance. Their skin is lightly tanned naturally, but he still remained a little pale, deathly pale almost. 

They wore a dark blue cloak that masked their physical appearance from sight. However no amount of shadows could hide the brightly shining sage irises that only Scorpious could have inherited. 

Harry Potter. Or more so a shadow of what once was Harry Potter, although this shadow of what once had been was indeed a shadow. It wasn’t entirely a shadow, but rather an angel that had a duty to see through, watch over its loved ones. 

An angel is born from suicide, but even though there are tales of heaven and hell, none of it exists. Despite that angels are purely believed in the wizarding world to be creatures that were once human which died from suicide. 

The pain they felt follows them into their new life style, memories, habits, everything. Harry Potter suffered dealing with the strikes at the ministry of magic, although it had nothing to do with him it did affect his job and pay. 

Not only that, but he felt downtrodden by his best friend Ron, whom decided dumping his own children on him was okay. Even though Harry didn’t have the time nor energy to babysit other children when he already had one that was- is still very important to him. 

Harry with his bright eyes stared fondly down at his son, small hands reach up towards his papa. His own eyes mirror their creators, slowly both their eyes begin to glisten with oncoming tears. 

Scorpious opens his small mouth, corners of his lips turning up into a small smile. Harry smiles gently at his son, forever shall he remind him of Draco. 

“Hello, son” Harry greets the young wizard quietly, gently reaching a hand out to lightly stroke his golden hair. 

A small bubbly gurgle irrupts from his wet lips, weakly leaning into the touch of his parents hand. Scorpius hadn’t smiled as much since his parents were fussing over him in the dining room, before Harry died. 

Harry drew back his hand, Scorpius began to breathe in deep breaths, chest beginning to heave. Tears only now trickling down his soft cheeks, Harry too. 

“Pa-Pa-Pa.. Paa-Paaaa!” Scorpius sobs loudly, hands clenching down on thin air. Eyes taking in the sight of his vanishing papa leaving him alone. Leaving Daddy all alone. 

Suddenly Draco charged into the room, eyes bright with promise of pain directed to nothing. Draco sighed deeply, chest deflating slowly and eyes dim as he stares sadly upon his son. 

“Score” he called out sweetly and quietly in hopes of calming his baby with his voice, but resulted in no change. 

The Malfoy stride towards the crib to gaze upon the crying baby, sage eyes stare back at him. Harry’s eyes. 

“You miss papa?” He states more than asks even though he didn’t expect an answer. 

Scorpius stopped crying almost immediately. 

“Me too”


	2. Building Blocks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Draco plays with building blocks alongside Scorpius, little does he realise that life is similar to the coulerful wooden blocks. But Draco doesn’t remember purchasing Scorpius the black block, after all it isn’t in the rainbow...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be prepared for sad times, emotional support. And also Draco’s not a happy bean he misses his husband

It was late evening time once Lord Malfoy arrived home, late. Guilt weighing down on his shoulders as he hung up his robe on the coatrack. A house elf peeked around the corner from the open ballroom, slowly they slink over to greet their master. “Good evening, Master Malfoy, How has your day fared?” Came the sniffly small voice, to which the wizard inwardly sighed at.

“Business is booming, charities are donating, wizard and witches are merry. The world is going about it’s buisness and it’s like my husband never existed, despite the fact he is the boy who lived” Draco murmurs quietly, eerily calm, the elf swallowed. Steadily it bowed their head as their master walked past them, through the ballroom to summon a bottle of whine, in one of the many comfy living rooms. 

“Harry, dear, love, husband, darkness to my light. Where in hell have you flown? You’re not here to raise Scorpius, our son, my son. He talks of you, everyday, funnily enough as though you are there talking with him. Wishful thinking.” Draco blinks furiously, trying to blink away possible tears that Harry no doubt would have caught with his finger tips. 

The blonde man stood in front of the roaring fireplace, staring into the flames of forevermore. All of a sudden Ron apparates in the room cradling the drowsy body of the Malfoy heir. Draco turns to face the ginger man with a cold expression, eager for the wizard to leave his sight immediately. Ron, with his shaggy red hair and scratchy stubble, kisses Scorpius’s mass of blonde hair. The young blonde opened his eyes to allow a painful green to pierce the man’s heart. 

He quickly passes the boy to his father, coldly, he nods a hello and goodbye before apparating away. No doubtebly to go home to his wife and children, wife. Ron had his partner, but the recently widowed blonde didn’t have his beloved. He remembers the last time they had spoken- “ Daddy, I wants bocks” Scorpius murmurs tiredly into the adults chest, sleep threatening to take him. Draco sighs, wine bottle forgotten on a coffee table. The Malfoy lord plopped his son onto the creame carpet beside his building blocks, immediately upon seeing them, the toddler gets to work. 

Carefully stacking a yellow block on top of an orange one, eyes focused on his building. Although he did spare a look to his right, “Papa, come play bocks” he spoke quietly, sounding afraid that he would scare his imaginary papa away. A bright smile spreads across his lips and he places a green block next to him, Draco blinked his tears away, Scorpius was clearly suffering. “Can I play blocks with you?” Came the fathers meek request, to which the young boy grinned in response to with delight. 

“Y-Yes please” Scopius chirped back in response and like that they sit in silence building towers, like life the blocks fall down on you when things look high. And crush hope of having the joy, such a dangerous thing. Most claim it’s a gift, but to Draco it’s something created and pushed away, although not many agree with his unpopular oppinion it didn’t bother him. 

Draco felt memories of Harry overflow and he felt his heart pound. Harry. Harry.Harry.Harry. Draco felt everything for him even when he’s dead and properly gone. There is no hell or heaven. Once your gone there is no afterlife. You die and nothing after, Scorpius picks up a black block and hands it to Draco “Love from Papa”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel so sad for our blonde beans, but this is a sad kinda story. I mean I needed the angst, so I could rid my own angst in the here and now. I’m sooo stressed with school and my throat hurts from reading too much

**Author's Note:**

> If you are struggling with depression, insomnia, suicidal thoughts or anything concerning and harmful, then please either tell a loved one, call the suicide help line, inform close friends or tell your doctor. 
> 
> TIL the next update - Sirius


End file.
